2019 Goals & Word // Let's Do This!

Woohoo! It is 2019! The last few years have been a doozy. Really really. 2018 was definitely the year where I experienced the most positive change and growth. I was able to move from managing my anxiety (and holding on for dear life), to actively working on some new improvements and feeling a little bit of motivation again. I think the last time I felt that way was about 2015. This year, oh this year.. this year I'm feeling so ready to work on so many things and have a lot of fun. I want out of the shell even more. I feel prepared to do it, because I've spent the last few years learning to take care of myself. That is so exciting, friends! (I'm having trouble expressing myself... but I think you get it!)

Personal vs. Common Goals

This year KC and I set some common goals and divided them up first into categories, and then into actionable chunks through the months. The header goals are the main ones, and the little bullets are ideas that we have to carry them out throughout the year. :) In other words... this might look like a massive list... but it's really just an actionable list to be divided up over the next 12 months. This makes the blog post look crazy, but I enjoy knowing how people break down their big goals, and their specific actions toward tackling them, so I wanted to share them anyhow! :) A lot of these are things that I put on my lists year after year and have trouble tackling by myself. I think approaching them as a family will make us more successful, and make it more fun!

So... here are my goals for 2019!

Personal Goals

Word of the Year: 

Cultivate!

I really want to grow all of the things. From a flower garden and pollinator friendly yard to better habits, and more diverse experiences.

Personal Goals:

Plant a Garden (flowers, fruit/veggies that we will eat, bee-friendly plants)
Go Kayaking (as much as possible)
Try Family Recipes and Learn Their Stories (probably document it)
More Outdoor Adventures (horseback riding, SUP, camping, hiking, etc.)
Read 60 Books (more fairy tales, more non-fiction, a few classics, a biography)
Feed the Birds!
Make a Hummingbird Cake
Go to the Beach
Settle into our home!
Try a New Pie Recipe

Common Goals:

Home

Things Have A Physical Home
     -Craft/Scrapbook Items
     -Books (build built-ins)
     -Closet Storage (winter clothes x_x)
     -Entertainment System (built in, video games, etc.)
     -Laundry Area (storage, tiny mudroom spot)
     -Kitchen Organization (streamline, creative storage)
     -Pantry Organization

Yard Woes + Low Maintenance Landscape
     -Get Grating Done (Save Money, Schedule)
     -Add Stair Rail to Outdoor Stairs
     -Edge the Sidewalk
     -Repair Fence
     -Landscaping on Hill
     -Wood Pile (cut up into manageable bits, dispose or us)
     -Tree Management (take down more trees? :(, save money, etc.)
     -Hang Up Mailbox
     -Grow a Moonflower Plant on Our Porch
     -Get a Lilac Plant
     -Buy Garden/Lawn Tools
     -Consider our backyard/driveway (garage? shed? patio area/furniture?)

Plan for Home Updates (budget, timeline, wish list, etc.)
     -Living Room Floor
     -Stair Flooring
     -Tile (both bathrooms, laundry room)
     -Back Splash
     -Paint Burgundy Strip of Wall
     -New Stove (gas?)
     -New Dishwasher
     -Furniture (chairs for upstairs, dining chairs, card table, etc.)
     -Hang Things on Walls
     -Light for Landing
     -Basement Storage (shelves, what goes down there, light, etc.)
     -Get "last" of Things from KC's Parent's House
     -Paint Bathroom Sink Cabinet
     -Paint Bedroom Furniture

Health

Take After Dinner Walks
Go Kayaking
Go Hiking
Spend More Time Outdoors

Money

Save Money to Achieve Goals (and determine what those are, how to prioritize, etc.)
     -Meet Twice Per Month About Budget
Reliable and Accurate Budget Plan

Learning

Master One Loaf of Bread
Add 5-10 New Reliable Recipes to Our Go-To List
     -Go to Aldi
     -Try a Few New Recipes Each Month (both choose!)

Lifestyle

Have a Kitchen Garden (use it)
     -Get Tools
     -Plan What To Grow (how much, map it out, planting schedule, etc. etc.)
     -Learn Maintenance, Skills, etc.
     -Grow Flowers (which, where, etc. etc.)
Learn to Meal Plan (in some capacity) by End of Year
Have Cleaning Schedule (light) by End of Year
Keep Social Calendar Manageable
     -Set Off Limits Days (no plans!)
     -Set Scheduled Days (to do an actual thing together)
     -Meet Every Sunday about Social Calendar (for upcoming week)
Focus on Our Marriage
     -Go On Two Dates Per Month
     -Enjoy More Everyday Together Activities (walks, cooking dinner, baking, playing games) vs. sitting and reading/playing video games. :)

Experiences

Make Plans for Europe (even if it's a 2020 or 2021 type of trip)
Volunteer/Give Back
Go to Hawaii
Go to the Beach (could be in Hawaii)

Because I think it's fun to look back... here are my goals from 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, and 2012!

What are your goals for this year? If you have a post, send me the link!! I'd love to read it... and get back into blogging and blog reading a bit more regularly this year!!

Do you break up your big goals to make them more actionable or manageable?

XO,

Alexandra

Goals & Word of the Year 2018 // FINALLY

Whew, this year is off to a slow start, but I am feeling back to my old self more or less. I want to stay up late to finish books or projects, I want to go out and do things, etc. So, I finally have some finalized goals for the year, and some thoughts on my word of the year as well.

2018 Goals:

"Invest" My Love, Money, and Time (see below for more)
Go to the Beach
Treat My Body Better
Watch 12 New (to me) Period Dramas
Buy A House - BUT DON'T SETTLE!
Eat Advenurously
Read 50 Books
See Family More
Get Warmer Socks
Have Adventures

Elaboration:

Where You Invest Your Love (& Time & Money), You Invest Your Life

This is something that I have been thinking about SO much lately. My word for the year is Invest, and here's why. Our world is kind of a mess sometimes. The news is terrifying, the internet is full of trolls, and sometimes I feel really really hopeless. One thing I thought of at the end of the year is this quote, which funnily enough was one of the first things I posted on this blog:

"Every time you spend money, you're casting a vote for the kind of world you want." - Anna Lappe

Wow, right? Its so true, and it is so easy to forget. I think that this quote definitely extends to the way you spend your time, and also your love.

This year I want to be more intentional about supporting the kind of world that I want.

Money: 

I've been thinking a lot about the word "invest". Not just in the sense of money, but in the sense of every resource and attention that I have. I want to invest my money in quality products, sustainable products, creative ones, things that will enhance my life and help me live a better one. Things that will allow me to create: paints, glitter, paper, and notebooks. I also want to invest my money in experiences, in learning, and in seeing new places. I want to hear live music, learn new skills, take classes, and see more of the world. I want to spend my money on sustainable goods, to sustainable companies. More quality clothing, more things made in the US, more things that are recyclable, used or ethically made.

Time, Love, and Attention:

I want to invest my time and attention in things that make my life and the world better. I want to spend more time an attention on taking care of my body. I want to move, stretch, get stronger and healthier, and get outside more. I want to have fun doing it, I want to start just doing it because it is what is good for me. What is necessary for me. An investment. I want to cook and eat better. Foods that I like, that my body craves, and that I need to remember to eat, because it is what is best for me. I want these things to help KC too by extension. Maybe there will be a fun hobby or means of exercise that we could both benefit from. 

I also want to invest my time in my marriage with KC. Over the years it becomes clearer and clearer that our life is about us. The two of us and our small family. We are so happy together, and I am so grateful for that, but putting more time and effort into getting quality time together, focusing more on his needs, and teamwork, etc. will only continue to make our relationship better.

As I learn new things, try new things, and explore I want to expand my world view. I want to gain perspectives, and become more involved in making the world a better place. I want to get involved in the community, volunteer, and have solutions or at least words or actions that can come at times when I don't know what to do or say. The world hurts so much right now especially, and I think that each person can make small differences if they try. I just need to come up with some practical and useful ways to do so. 

There you go only a month and a half late. heheh but I am happy with what I have. I have more elaborating to do on my own end, but it isn't necessary to post here.

What about you guys? What are your goals for the year and how are you doing with them?!

XO,

Alexandra

Have You Heard? // Ellie Goulding - "Don't Panic"

Whew, sometimes it feels like there's a lot to panic about. Sometimes tiny things, sometimes huge ones. Recently I can say that there's been a lot of strain on my family and KC and I with fairly big things (in the scheme of our lives). However, I read an interesting article that is meant to help manage anxiety. It says to place the worst case scenario (or what did happen) on a scale between 1 and 100. Likely when you think about it, it's not going to be 100. Or even 50 sometimes. That's what I've been telling ourselves. I can promise you though, I don't know how to rate current world strife and U.S. political decisions. I just feel lost about it.

Anyhow, last year, about this time, I was applying for my current "perfect job". It's nothing fancy, but it was perfect for me. Recommending books and creating book lists at my local library, working part time (even though it was evenings and weekends), and getting to work with people again. I turned the resume/etc. around quickly, I didn't sleep much, but I was SO proud of what I turned in. I was exhausted, really stressed, I don't think I could move my neck.... but one night we had tickets to see Ellie Goulding. We almost didn't go. But I'm really glad that we did. I didn't end up getting the job, I'll probably never know why..., but I did gain a great soundtrack for pumping up and calming down alike.

Today is my Friday! 5. Day. Weekend. 🙌🏻 . . . . . . . . . . #latergram #Friday #weekend #dontpanic #ootd #wiw

A post shared by Alexandra Consolver (@simplyalexandra12) on May 26, 2016 at 5:27am PDT

I purchased this t-shirt and I like to wear it like a reminder. So, in more uncertain times, I'm trying not to panic.



How are you guys doing? I hope that you're doing well.

On a positive note, if you read about my dental anxiety... you'll be happy to hear that I went in for my root canal... and it ended up just being a crown! And then he went ahead and filled nearby cavities. For the most part it wasn't too bad. I'm glad that I decided to do the nitrous, it really helped. In the end we paid less for the whole quadrant of my mouth than we would have on the one tooth! I even scheduled my other side (may actually be a root canal, small tooth... :( ) for a month from now. I want to keep knocking them out! Despite the lingering pain, I feel good about working toward my goal and conquering my fears. :)

What are you guys up to this weekend?!?!

This weekend is not too bad for us, though every other weekend through June is very full! haha Tonight I am having a movie/junk food night with my girls, and Sunday we are celebrating OE's bday! Hoping to take the rest of the weekend slow! :)

Other Posts This Week: Apricot Adobo Pork Loin + Asparagus & Library Book Sale Haul.

XO,

Alexandra

Currently // No More Vagueblogging

Well, I have no post prepared for today... so here's what I'm up to currently... / an explanation behind all that vagueblogging.

Drinking: iced non fat no whip mocha from Starbucks and iced water. Trying hard to drink a lot less soda recently. I think it's going well overall. Also picked up chambord this year, have you guys had this...?! Delicious.

Eating: KC has been making bacon, eggs, and toast some mornings. #spoiled We were making a lot of Irish-y meals last week... and last night we made Chicken Bruschetta Pasta... which is the bomb dot com. (that is from back when KC and I first got married, I had the crazy idea to try 100 new recipes that year... yikes... glad we have revisited this one!)

Watching: Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries (in season 3, I don't want it to end!!), and New Girl for the bazzilionth time.

Reading: Outlander. *all the blushing emojis* Also reading The Bone Witch. I recently finished Saga (a graphic novel) and I LOVED it. 5 Stars, go pick it up!!! (rated Mature...) Also, I'm not someone who reads a lot of graphic novels yet... so ... I think this is saying something... :)

Listening To: hmm not much. I'm still obsessed with the Chainsmokers X Coldplay song. 1989 has been in the car... but listening to music has been low priority recently.

Feeling (physically): sick. I've got bad allergies or a cold. I can't tell which, but it's not really letting up. :( Currently at that stage where my nose starts running spontaneously. Boo.

Feeling (emotionally): drained.

It's been a doozy of a year so far you guys. I know I vagueblogged you guys forever... so I'll just get it out here quickly...

On the 2nd of January my mom announced that she was leaving AZ and heading back to KS with my younger sister. We weren't given a lot of explanation as to what was going on, or was wrong, or anything like that, she just left. They moved in with my grandma who lives here, and not too long after that my grandma had a serious accident. I mean like, a week after them moving in. She is mostly recovered now, but it's been a lot of care and therapy, etc. Then my uncle (who has some health issues) was admitted to the hospital... and it wasn't looking good for a week or two... but he is also recovering now. (thank goodness to both of those!) All of this was happening while my sister Jess was you know, 9 months pregnant. So we tried our hardest to support who we could, but to prioritize taking care of each other and our own families. That baby being born is the brightest spot in our year, and I hope that things keep looking up now that he's here. So anyhow, my dad came in to town to see the baby a few weeks ago (right before KC's bday week), and he and my mom started working out the details of their divorce. It wasn't a fun weekend for anyone to say the least. It's been a long and complicated few months, but I'm to the point where I just want them to do what they need to do. I'm not sad about it or anything like that, but I'm tired of the stress. Jess and I both want to be there for our parents, but we're their children too. So we're doing our best to step out of it (over and over) and keep taking care of ourselves and each other. The main thing I'm worried about right now is our sister OE, who's going to turn 10 next month. I know this is fairly succinct (no one needs all of the details), it's not meant to be unfeeling, just informational. Believe me... I've had #allthefeels .

So yeah... here's to abolishing major anxiety in 2017, right?

In all seriousness, I'm trying to work through it and take care of myself as much as possible. My anxiety is a big issue without all of these things, so I'm trying to be pretty direct with everyone about my needs right now. It feels selfish sometimes, but I also need to remember that taking care of myself isn't selfish. It's necessary.

This should also be a pretty good indicator of why most of my goals were about stress, self care, making less plans, staying home more, etc. rather than making more and more plans. And yes, this is also why KC and I decided to move and save money so last minute at the beginning of the year.

What have you guys been up to lately?

Anyone been through something like this? 

Always open to more self care ideas...

XO,

Alexandra

Conquering Fears // Slowly but Surely

Hello friends! Today I'm getting real about fears and anxiety... read on.

Last week I read Audrey's post about her fear of flying, and how she is taking steps to make flights more manageable and less anxiety-filled. Wow, what is it about people bearing their truths on the internet that makes us feel less alone?! Even though I don't have a fear of flying, I do have a fear of the dentist and reading Audrey's post gave me some encouragement that I desperately needed!

If you've kept up here... you may have seen me move "GO TO THE FREAKING DENTIST" on my 2016 goal list from month to month with no progress. In January (2017), I FINALLY made the appointment that I had been putting off. That in and of itself was a big step for me! Anyhow, I could really relate to Audrey's post... so here's my version.

When you're a kid and you go to the dentist, cavity free teeth win you a prize. If you were like me, you grew up fishing out crummy jumping frogs and bracelets out of a giant tooth each visit you made. Luckily, I was a kid who never needed braces either. So I equated perfect teeth, and perfect reports, with that prize. With being "good". Having good teeth made me a good person.

Late in high school I got my first cavity. I had no dental anxiety at that point in time, so while I wasn't looking forward to getting it filled...  I wasn't scared. Well let's just say the numbing shot was enough to totally freak me out. All of a sudden I could feel the needle, feel the pressure, feel the drilling, even though I couldn't feel the pain. The sensations were way too much for me. When I left, I had a whole new opinion of the dentist.

Around that same time I got my wisdom teeth removed. Nearly everyone has to do this as a teen, and I wasn't that nervous about it either. I went in to get my consultation at the oral surgeon, the turned on a video to "prep me". Images of diagrams, teeth, etc. etc. flashed before me, and I didn't even know it... but I was crying. They made me stop mid-way through, which is fine I guess. But what a weird response, right?! I didn't even know that I was doing it. It wasn't anything particular, it was just the video as a whole. During my operation I started to come-to during the procedure. I didn't feel any pain, but I did feel the pressure and motion at least for a second. It was so unsettling! I don't think you're supposed to wake up...! My recovery was fine, no issues, no pocket things, no vomiting, etc. I was eating a turkey sandwich just a few days later.

In college my mom kept us going to our childhood dentist. It was about 30-40 minutes from where I was living. Half way through college we stopped going together as a group. The scheduling was too hard. I was supposed to find a dentist where I was living... but I didn't. I think the insurance was confusing, my dad was changing jobs (and insurance) several times during my college years, so I just never did it. I couldn't keep up with the changes, and never made it enough of a priority... though I definitely should have.

After college, I made an appointment with a recommended dentist. Very gentle, very nice, etc. I went in and she reminded me of Mrs. Kim from GG. She was very stern and made me feel awful from the get-go. I instantly felt the reversal of the good teeth = good kid / good person feeling I had. I felt like an awful person... even though your teeth have nothing to do with your character. To top it off, the week before this exam, my IUD (which had recently been inserted) fell out of place, and then had to be removed. (which was another ordeal...) So when they asked, "Is there a possibility you are pregnant?" - I had to say yes. Mrs. Kim did not seem to understand why this situation had occurred, or why I wouldn't know. In addition there were 2-3 other hygienists in there as well, in on the conversation. I did my initial appointment and then I never went back.

Fast forward to now... I've got a new dentist. I told them about my anxiety, and did my initial appointment. They didn't make me feel bad at all, which is great but I still had some anxiety. Now I've got to go back for a normal cleaning (which I'm not worried about) and (some) host of other appointments for cavities and even a root canal. :( It's going to cost tons of money, and my anxiety about it is just as high as it was before. I'm going to make myself do it (of course), while I have the momentum... but I'm very much dreading the experience.

Any tips for keeping calm during dental procedures?!?! - please share!!

Things I'm thinking so far:

• Headphones in with a soothing playlist
• Possibly a weighted blanket or the x-ray blanket... (I've read that weighted blankets help with general anxiety)
• Putting it first thing in the morning so I can get it over with and not have any food/drink beforehand
• Some type of calming mantra
• Taking comfort in preventative measures I'm taking around reducing future dental issues, and tracking those in my habit tracker (brushing TWICE a day, flossing daily, using a prescription (extra fluoride) toothpaste in the evenings, cleanings every 6 months, researching healthier caffeine sources)

Please share your thoughts, experiences, anxieties in the comments. (if you want)

I feel like even though your fear and mine may not be the same, we can relate to each other on dealing with them! Another post that was similar to this was Lauren's post on driving anxiety. Which I do have a bit of.

Thanks for reading & in advance for the ideas and support!

XO,

Alexandra

2017 Goals & Word

Wow, Happy Wednesday friends,

I don't know about you, but 2017 has started with an explosion... and not a good one. I'm not really ready to get into it, but let's just say this explosion has caused some after booms for me and KC (and plenty of others). Most of which are confusing. But KC and I are trying to use our energy in a positive way, if not getting little intensely motivated/extreme. More on all this later...bleh.

Reflections & Goal Planning/Explanation: 

I did some reflecting on 2016 and a lot of what I realized about my anxiety is that it often stems from a lack of space. Whether that is physical space, mental space, or a sense of freedom. So a lot of my goals are centered around those ideas. :) This may seem like a giant list, but a lot of it is written to accommodate specific ideas, and *trying* things... even if I don't end up implementing them longer-term. Some of them are also things that I am currently doing, that I want to continue with. I've been thinking hard about all of my goals and issues I want to work on, and what those big and small moving pieces are. So, I am choosing the word "space" this year for obvious reasons. I don't usually pick a word, but I think it will really help me focus this year! :)

Health 

Work out 3x's per normal week (at least)
Put Healthy Meals on Rotation
Try 25 New Healthy Recipes (add them to rotation if we like them enough!)
Get new mattress = sleep better
Continue to take stairs and walks at work
Try out at least one active hobby (ideas: SUP, kayaking, boxing, etc.)
Get dental work done
Visit a dermatologist
Attempt grazing - I'm the WORST snacker...
Focus on healthy breakfasts & caffeine sources

Stress

Limit & be intentional with plans that we make
Do one de-stressing activity per day (yoga, coloring, reading, meditating, etc.)
De-clutter (physical clutter = mental clutter)
     -sort through boxes and tubs in storage at KC's parent's house - ALREADY STARTED!
     -coat closet
     -wall hanging items
     -kitchen cabinets/kitchen craziness...
     -under bathroom sink
     -bathroom linen closet
     -jewelry box
     -vanity!!
     -boxes of un-homed junk...
     -things I hide in the closet....
     -filing paperwork....
Reduce amount of technology that I have to deal with
     -limit notifications
     -unsubscribe from email lists
     -delete drobox from laptop...
     -have "un-reachable" times?
     -etc.
Check long-standing items off my to-be-done list. I love Gretchen Rubin's 1 hour per week idea!
     -being healthy (folded in above)
     -dentist (same)
     -DSLR skills
     -sewing skills
     -reading classics
Make a point to listen to music!
Purchase an essential oil diffuser
Look into getting a weighted blanket

Brand

Populate my Etsy with invite templates
Do a bridal show (maybe)
Make Flyers and put up around town #oldschool
Re-brand blog
Continue/improve with Youtube
Scheduling items (see scheduling section below)
Learn more about what y'all like reading about in this space!

Creative

Take a cooking class
Pick up (try) either: sewing, knitting, crochet, embroidery... something NON-paper!
Do a 2017 PL/scrapbook album (monthly highlights, as the year goes on) - keep sharing the progress!
Attend more non-concert live performances
Do some type of photo challenge (even a short one)
Apply to be on 2018 creative teams with documenting brands!
Take a DSLR course
Food in Jars challenge with Rachel (flexibly!)
Make a new dessert
Get a better/more versatile printer for documenting

Scheduling

Set up a rough guideline for using my Tuesdays well (or a rigid schedule)
Make a social media posting schedule (because I forget and it stresses me out!)
Make a cleaning schedule
Try some meal-prepping schedules - find something that works pretty well

Cozy Family - inspired by the ideas of hygge and minimalism

Learn about Hygge and apply some ideas from it to our day-to-day life
Create more traditions with KC as our own little family (seasonal, holiday, weekend, little things, etc.)
Make a point to enjoy and experience each season
Be at home more
Take our time and be slow

Books

Read 50 total books
Read at least one book from each category:
     -biography/memoir
     -poetry
     -graphic novel
     -horror
     -science fiction
     -thriller
     -mystery
     -historical fiction
     -short story
     -essay
Complete a reading challenge
Read 5 Non-fiction books, not including cookbooks/craft books that are just skimmed
Read 5 Classics (ideas: Jane Austen & F. Scott Fitzgerald, War and Peace, and Wuthering Heights)
Continue with book ban (specifically reading mostly owned books, and selling them once I am done reading!)

Travel

Go back to NOLA
Plan out NYC!
<3 p=""> Visit at least two other new places (even if they are close-by)
Travel with friends
Try a new food

Entertaining

Find a dress for SIL's wedding
Plan bachelorette/shower night for Juliet
Continue having game nights
Epic KC bday week
Have a "Galantine's Party"!
Give 6 little gifts
Spoil the heck outta Jess's baby
Swap GG nights for Movie nights with close friends
Generally plan more things with my girlfriends (because they're pretty amazing)

What do you do specifically do de-stress?

Do you have an essential oil diffuser? If so, which one, I'm on the hunt... but there's tons to sift through! #overwhelmed

Likewise, there are a ton of books on Hygge, have any of you read them? Also sifting through TONS of those!! 

Healthy/easy breakfast ideas? Send them my way!! 

What do you do for little traditions with your family/SO/Roomie/etc.?

What types of posts do you most like to read here? Which ones don't you love? What do you want to see more of, or added to this blog?

I know most of you have posted your goals for the year, and I've loved reading them! But feel free to tell me more about them below!!

Let's do this 2017!

XO,

Alexandra